Friday, March 16, 2012

My Crazy Life

This new job is literally crazy. I enjoy it, but I'm very hesitant to enjoy it. I'm a preschool teacher, and I work at the school founded and directed (basically owned but it's non profit so it has no real owner) by my mother. My sister also founded it, so some of the 'owner' duties are on her, and they trickle down onto me. Today I was in with the older kids. I generally stay in the infant toddler room, but I'm good with any of the age groups so they utilize me everywhere.
I was helping set up for nap by laying out mats, and the kids were wild. I'd put bedding on a mat, and they'd pull it off, tell them we were JUST looking at books, and they'd run to the kitchen. They were pulling jackets off of hook, and pulling the hooks off the wall. They were literally going from one naughty thing to the next as a herd. My mother was in the other end of the classroom cleaning up from lunch. I told her about 5 times "I need help". My mother didn't get it her said "I am helping!" she was helping to clean, I needed help to regain control.
My sister walked in to take her girls somewhere and I just told her "Are you in here? I have to step out." She was confused, my mom was too, and I just repeated "I have to leave." and walked out. Where I promptly burst into tears, and head to the kitchen/break room.
I have never been so instantly overwhelmed like that. I am usually pretty tough, and the kids listen to me well. I've also been in the room during the lunch to nap transition and it is wild. But I've never been so totally spent that I broke into tears. I'm just so overwhelmed lately. I've been sick, but we are short handed at the school so my mom hasn't been too understanding when I tell her that I can't come in. She makes me feel bad for being sick, and it is unfair. No other employee gets talked into "take medicine and call me in half an hour". If they are sick, they are sick end of story. They sleep it off and come in tomorrow.

So being sick I haven't been able to go to the ranch much. I need my ranch time. That is my relaxing me time, and I now realize that I desperately need it. The other day I had the MOST fantastic ride with Roxy. I did almost fall off, but that's tomorrow's entry. I went to do stalls, but I talked myself into riding Roxy, and it was great. So I plan on remember how important that me time is, and continuing to really thoroughly enjoy my riding time.

Are your horses your me time? How do you unwind? Have you ever burst into tears at work?

4 comments:

  1. Ugh. That suck...totally and completely been there...and I feel on the unsympathetic boss thing...

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    1. It's even worse when your boss is also your mom.

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  2. Awe, I'm so sorry you've had a rough time. My me time is def at the barn. Now that my leg is broken I am figuring out how much that time means to me too. I've never burst into tears at work but I have been lately from being overwhelmed. Hopefully things slow down for you soon.

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    1. I don't know how you manage without some ranch time! Think of how much easier life will be when you get better, both because you wont have a broken leg, and you'll get your you time back. It's easy to forget how important that is.

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